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Poetry, For Your Enjoyment

I’m thinking perhaps I should branch out and show my other talents beside health and wellness coaching; therefore, once a week I will present my rich, deep poetry.
Let us begin this soul-touching series with my latest thoughts—

Ode To An Elusive Booger, Part I

Elusive booger
Today I call you out
Though the dangers of sugar
Are what I normally spout

Despite expelling
The rest of your family
In steaming shower
You cling nasal
Like a putrid dead flower

On my way to meeting
The thought is fleeting
I need to pick your ass out
Without causing nose bleeding

At traffic light red
I fill with dread
Realizing I’ve not a tissue
To deal with this booger issue

Mine archenemy slimy
I hold nostril closed
Give a hard puff
Not sure,
But I think something blows

I look at my hands
Check out the steering wheel
Nothing there,
Nothing I can really feel

Such peace of mind
A cleansing powerful squirt
Until at meeting time
Someone utters,
“You’ve got something on your shirt…”

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Wash Your Hands, Goddammit

It’s time to get serious for a moment; as you all know, heading into cold and flu season, we must protect ourselves as best we can—I’m trying my best to wash my hands each time I step into my home, enter a dining establishment, etc., whenever and wherever—this is so important—my dear grandmother passed this simple, common sense notion to my mom, and she reminded me just recently as I stepped into her home, by asking/commanding me, “go wash your hands, honey…”
I got over myself (it’s not all about me, nu?) real quick upon realizing it wasn’t personal, and how few times I actually wash my hands during the day. (exceptions being when I use the bathroom, public/private, etc.)
You can take vitamin C until you poop your brains out, but by then you’ve probably been dealing with a runny nose or aches or some other ill-timed annoyance.
Wash your hands, goddammit, and don’t get sick in the first place. And no, you don’t need a fancy antibacterial soap, either. Good old Ivory still smells good to me, nu?

Your health & wellness guy loves you!

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Blog Post #1

Diet King Health Monster, LLC.

Thank you so much for visiting my site! This here is my first new blog post in a very long time and I’m very excited to share it with you!

The last time I blogged was in 2005 or 2006; I’m not quite sure which year I stopped, and really, who cares?
Back then I was known as the ‘Diet King,’ as I had just written and published the book bearing that name; I was always online writing about the latest diet fads and health-related research I stumbled upon.

Now I’m going by ‘Diet King Health Monster,’ because, well… I am a monster; a nice one, anyway—I so want to help those I care for, even those whom I don’t know, that I can sometimes come across as overbearing and egg-headed in my hasty delivery. I’m working on that, but I still have tremendous passion for disseminating the latest information I come across when it relates to health issues and wellness/diet strategies. I don’t want you to suffer unnecessarily! I really do care, damn it!

So this blog will be a continuation of what I started so many years ago—except I’m a bit of an old fart now and technology sometimes scares the crap out of me—(sometimes? who am I kidding?) but I’m doing my best to learn…quickly.

The Diet King Health Monster blog will be a place where I can peddle my own erroneous opinion, which each and every one of us is entitled to, as well as a safe, loving and fun place to trade ideas and thoughts. Depending on my mood, (I can be moody sometimes too…’ah humanity…’) I may want to discuss something that’s bugging me (which may be totally unrelated to diet and health and wellness)—but I promise you’ll be entertained!

All in all, this blog not about being right and having all the answers all the time—it’s about all of us getting to know each other and working toward better health for everyone who is interested.

I’m so excited about this; I hope you are too! Please feel free to leave any comments, questions and miscellaneous thoughts here—I’ll be happy to “tawk” to you and help you in any way I can.

Be Well!